You are here.

For years I was convinced that my actions didn’t have an impact on others, that I could make myself invisible at will and it wouldn’t make any difference to the world. After all, there are so many people! What’s one more? Eventually, I realized that not showing up is as forceful a decision as choosing to participate or be engaged. When someone is crying? Ignoring their tears, far from being a neutral choice, is as loud a proclamation as an expression of sympathy or comfort; it’s just a proclamation in the opposite direction. Intended or not, silence and neutrality can communicate, “I don’t care about you.” For better or for worse, being silent is not the same as being absent. For better or worse, you exist.

Life forces you to choose a posture. You’re already here and can’t leave. You matter and what you do affects others. Fact. Curled up in the fetal position, refusing to make decisions, is indeed a posture. In the physical realm as much as the mental, your posture informs what you do (and vice versa) in a feedback loop. Articles have been written about standing in a “power pose” just before a job interview for a chemical boost in confidence.

You cannot keep your posture hidden from others, at least not for too long. It’s more evident than you realize and is often conveyed without direct description. When a friend walks up to you reading in a chair, they already know you’re sitting without the benefit of a, “Hi. I’m sitting right now.”

On the other hand, everyone is limited, seeing the stance others are in without necessarily knowing why they’ve chosen it (or whether they feel they have a choice). Others have their own impression of you, and their own impression of your circumstance, but never your impression of you and your impression of your circumstance. They see from a different angle. They can’t see the scenery inside your head, the private peaks and valleys of your soul that you must factor in.

Though no one can copy another person’s life, anyone can mimic another person’s attitude. In this way, your attitude, your posture, is the gift you give the world. This is why we can be inspired even or maybe especially by the terminally ill and those who have overcome much hardship. We wouldn’t blame them for being bitter or shattered on the floor, and when instead they bravely look each day in the face and reach for the new joys that are always coming, we are delighted and realize their open-armed posture is possible for anyone, regardless of placement.

Is your posture one of awe, worship, gratitude? One of defiance? Are you inflexible or willing to dance to whatever music happens to be playing? Are you curled up in a ball or sitting relaxed? Lying in a heap or standing with your feet planted and your hands on your hips like a superhero (like you should be doing in the bathroom before a job interview)? Running in a chosen direction with a practiced stride, or meandering aimlessly? Make it count. It already does.